Royal Decrees

The following are a series of changes to the law that will be made after I take over.

1. The Emperor has absolute power. He will be able to make or break any decree at any time, regardless of His sanity or mental state. The Emperor does not need to follow his own decrees, and any persons who object will be dealt with in a manner which the Emperor believes is fitting. This may range to no punishment, for people He likes, to eternal torture, for people He dislikes or is indifferent towards. He will also have absolute control over everything that goes on in the Empire. His appointed ministers and other high ranking officials are simply for keeping an eye on the country while His attention is elsewhere. At the end of the proverbial day, He can change or undermine any of His underlings at His whim.
   
2. Individuals deemed useless to society will be put to good use. There are many options currently being considered for such wastes of resources. It has been suggested that these personnel be studied and their bodily nutrients and energies be extracted for use on various other projects. Others suggest, to this Emperor's great liking, that these people have their bodies donated to medical science, and yet more others suggest that the remainder of their functional organs be donated to those in dire need. Their assets will be liquidated and assimilated into the empire. Their families will not be compensated, and in some cases they will be punished for harbouring a drain on the empire's limited resources. How people are deemed useless to society is covered in Decree 3.
3. People are deemed useless by the Emperor. This process involves a complex mathematical formula, which calculates the ratio of how much the person has gained from society to how much the person has put back into society. Obviously this is no simple equation as the worth of individuals to society is not purely monetary. The person is useless if this ratio is greater than 1.5. Of course, the elderly and those in a coma, who generally cannot put much back into society, will be judged on how useful they were in life and how much it costs the Empire to sustain them. If the cost to sustain them far outweighs what they were worth, or in the case of the comatose, how much they might be worth if they woke up as well, then they will be deemed useless to society. Pensions are covered in Decree 4. Obviously the Emperor cannot review each individual to determine whether or not they are useful, so it has instead been left to the people of the Empire to suggest persons who they think are useless. Those who have no source of income, i.e. the unemployed, the elderly and so on, are judged based on what it will cost to sustain these persons. So, this is an advanced warning to the unemployed: get a job or do a lot of good to society or else you will be assimilated into the Empire.
   
4. Pensions will be allocated according to how much the person is/was to society. Disabled persons will be allocated money according to how much they earn as a direct result of their work and also how useful their work is to society. The more they make, the less pension they receive and the more their work is of value to society, the more they receive.
5. Spammers absolutely will not be tolerated. All incidences of spamming will be relentlessly investigated by my own secret service: the ISA (Imperial Security Agency). Those who are found to be spamming anything will be dealt with quickly and harshly. Their punishment will involve horrendous pain and immense embarrassment to the offender, with a subsequent but extremely delayed death. They will be made to wish the human race never existed, for then they would not exist to feel the pain of their torture. No device will be deemed too cruel or inhumane to use on such scoundrels and no method deemed too vicious. One example that comes to mind is the extraction (but not section) of the gonads of a fully conscious subject to be fed to wild dogs while they are still attached. Such is the fate of the stupid.