That's it...

World domination has to start now!

I'll start by eliminating my worst enemies: exams (and therefore study).

Oh, it'll be so sweet seeing my beautiful geese marching into war! Oh to gaze upon the battlefield as their anal guns tear my foes to small fish-food-sized bites! Delicious!

There will be great feasting afterwards! Let's make it our custom to eat our fallen after every battle. Oh I'm salivating already!

To aid the domination process, I've created miniature biographies of my minions (click on Minions of the Empire on the sidebar). How does this aid my efforts? When people realise how efficient and ruthless a group I run, they will surely bow before me!

Sports mascots

I don't know what it is with sports teams and really randomly weird mascots, but after I take over the world it is going to stop.

Because I don't know that many international sports teams, I will draw on Australias' as examples. I don't know what these mascots are meant to represent, but it can really confusing. Take for example the Melbourne Demons of the AFL. What are they supposed to do? Be totally evil? Have bad breath (from all that brimstone they eat)? What about the Fremantle Dockers? What is a 'Docker' anyway and why would anyone want to be one? What, are they going to defeat my team by loading and unloading ships? What the?

I can understand mascots that represent strength and all that, like bulls, or any carnivores. But seriously, some of those mascot ideasmen need to be shot. Numerous times. In the 'nads.

I wonder if the intellectual sports, like chess, have mascots. Of course, they would have to fit in the mould of their sport. We could have teams like the Melbourne Ailuropoda Melanoleuca or the Perth Delphinidae. Or how about the Brisbane Panthera Onca, the Sydney Acinonyx Jubatus or the Hobart Falco Peregrinus.

With great ideas like these I can't believe I haven't already been voted world ruler. Or at least received some international prizes!

Decree #5

I was sitting on my porcelain throne the other day and pondering the issues of the world (as you do) when I came up with another article to add to the list of changes (a.k.a. Royal Decrees) that will be made to this world when I become its ruler. Just to let you know, this one was inspired by some of the comments I've received on this blog. You people know who you are. This one's for you.

On with the decree:

Spammers absolutely will not be tolerated. All incidences of spamming will be relentlessly investigated by my own secret service: the ISA (Imperial Security Agency). Those who are found to be spamming anything will be dealt with quickly and harshly. Their punishment will involve horrendous pain and immense embarrassment to the offender, with a subsequent but extremely delayed death. They will be made to wish the human race never existed, for then they would not exist to feel the pain of their torture. No device will be deemed too cruel or inhumane to use on such scoundrels and no method deemed too vicious. One example that comes to mind is the extraction (but not section) of the gonads of a fully conscious subject to be fed to wild dogs while they are still attached. Such is the fate of the stupid.

Milestones

Today marks another major developmental milestone for me as a maniacal tyrant.

That's right my loyal subjects, I executed my very first dissident! He was questioning whether I would be fit to rule. What an arrogant bastard. Of course I'm fit to rule! I've been destined to preside over the world since before the birth of the stars! Of course in those days there wouldn't have been anyone around to tell the future, nor would there have been very much to tell the future from...but I assure you, all this has been preordained. By the universe, by some higher power or whatever, but it HAS been preordained. Because I said so. And don't you dare question me or you will end up like our friend, who was executed by inducing in him autophagia (or "eating of oneself"). Of course, I'm not totally inhumane, so I provided him with salt and barbeque sauce to improve the taste of it all. He seemed to enjoy it...mildly. I couldn't tell because one minute he was crying and the next he was really tucking in to what seemed to be quite a feast for him.

I'll never forget the sight of him eating his still beating heart before collapsing in a heap of half-eaten tissue. Even in death he couldn't do anything right. What a waste of good space. But, since I am a firm believer in recycling, his remains were distributed to my army as a boost to their weekly red meat allowance. Now I just hope that he didn't have spongiform encephalopathy. I wouldn't be surprised though, seeing as he was so blatantly demented and delirious.

Ah, I love my job.

Planning for world domination

The wheel has been set in motion. Today marks the day in which I start my plan for my ultimate goal: taking over Donut King...I mean the world.

I can't reveal too much at this time, although I can say that my grand, very elaborate scheme involves a peanut. Plus an army of geese. Oh, and the one hundred odd megatons worth of explosives to boot.

Why the geese? Well I thought that would be quite obvious. Geese are vicious, vicious animals. They have no fear, they feel no pain and most of all they love the taste of fresh blood, especially in the morning. If you've ever seen a steel-beaked goose attack a hapless serf you'd know what I'm on about. Plus, geese are easy to keep in line. If some of them are misbehaving you only need to eat a few of them to show the rest you're not fooling around. And they're delicious too, which is a big bonus. No more thing as casualties of war. They'd just become dinner! Or lunch, or even breakfast if you were that keen.

And best of all...NObody suspects the geese!

Mehehehehehehehahahahahahahohohohohohohohuhuhuhu!



...Also I don't have enough followers to form an army of humans. So geese armed with sharpened steel beaks and a gun implant in their anus. Why the anus? Well so I can get my generals to yell to my enemies: "Suck anus bitch!", of course, as any self-respecting general would willingly perform.

I see the parallels to Austin Powers, where Dr Evil wants sharks with lasers on their heads but instead gets mutated seabass...except perhaps my geese won't be as vicious. I don't want any mishaps involving my precious, precious monkeys...I mean henchmen...

Of course, taking over the world by force won't be easy, even armed with an army of rabid geese. There will come a time when I will have to use guile and diplomacy to win over the hearts of those I'm trying to conquer. But, being no good at such things I will have to leave that to my ministers. And if they fail, a beheading will await them. No incompetency will be tolerated in this Empire.

All I need to do is to kill kill kill, and perhaps everyone else will fall in line. And, the world being so uncivil, no one will think to band together to oppose me! It's the perfect plan!

Posterior Approximal, part 2

-this blog may be dedicated to the amalgam bunny but it continues to smite me
- posterior approx cavity prep: make sure the whole contact area is cleared but at the same time try to keep margin as small as possible
- line with Vitrebond- perio probe it! and use the perio probe to remove vitrebond off the vertical walls.
- Tofflemayer matrix: open end to gingiva, small circumference to gingiva
- place wedge with flat surface at bottom (remember that it's an isoceles triangle)
- make sure small screw is tight so that tightening of the large screw doesnt pull matrix band out.
- mix amalgam for 7 secs (8 secs= over mixed, 6 sec= dry)
- use carrier to condense the first increment (very, very important!)
- condense increment with sides and tip of your condenser
- push the amalgam towards the marginal ridge to get more bulk there
- marginal ridges cant be too low or too high, must have dip in the middle to be just right
- make sure amalgam capsule is discarded immediately
- scrap amalgam goes in amalgam container
- use meth spirits to wipe down
- place amaglam in small increments to have best condensation but also do this quickly so that it doesnt dry out and harden
- the amalgam in the cavity stays plastic for a lot longer than that in the amalgam cup
- condense like the wind! (with the smallest condenser...)
- use a burnisher to give shine
- carve back the excess mercury amalgam at surface
- make sure you know the shape of your cavity design: and dont leave flash
- carve back with carver along tooth contour so you dont over carve or under carve
- beware of overhangs! (use matrix and wedge properly)
- marginal ridges are a BUGGER. redoing the same cavity 4 times= no fun

NV: finish post approx restorations, amalgamate!

Hello, Library?

Welcome to my domain. Not enough people know how a library works. Contrary to common belief, a library is a hip and happening place. Indeed we have a whole section devoted to hip replacements and just 'happen' to have 89 books on travelling to places.

Onto the tour anon! To your right, we have the quite study area. Watch the steps because the people studying DO NOT like to watch yo sorry ass (excuse the ghetto) falling over and spilling books everywhere. Also moving of desks around is prohibited. The archivist in that far corner will slap you with black and white photos for blocking her light.

To the left is the magazine rack and the computer terminals. The former is forlorn as no one truly wants to read 'The Technology Annual' or 'Economy for Lithuanians'. However, these are the only glossy publications the library can afford as all funding has been diverted to the Betty Ford Clinic where 3 senior staff members are being treated for addiction to that new book smell. Mmmm.... NO! I've been clean for 3 weeks. I must be strong.
The latter is inevitably packed with assorted scum. You know, the people who come into this temple of literacy and besmirch it with their Britney Spears websites and addiction to Neopets. (Even though we try to discourage them by running Windows 95 and using Netscape.)

Beyond the computers are the shelves. So creaky and dusty... so beautifully packed with books... except the John Marsden section which is in constand disarray...

This is the true heart of the library. The holy altar where we commune with the spirits of authors past, present and inspire the writings of those to come. Unlike the cold, frowning faces at bookshops, the tall shelves here are cozy. In unsuspecting corners you will find soft armchairs. They never seem to be there the next day... its almost as if the sprites emerge from the well thumbed leaves of Tolkien and move furniture around for light entertainment.

This is a place of shelter, of peace. Indeed, it is not even a true location... merely a space to store your physical body while your mind explores destinations beyond the stars or in your hearts.
Limitless possibilities open with each book... and each book opens with limitless possibilities. For the words speak to each of us alone and only you can make them sing.

Look unbelievers, look beyond the whitewashed walls, adorned only with posters of the latest Harry Potter. Look beyond the untouched resources section... for even I will admit they are truly useless.
Look beyond the prim and surly matron behind the desk, grimly contacting all the new arrivals- because behind those steel rimmed glasses lies the heart of a little girl: running playfully across the prairies of North Dakota, or perhaps holding hands with Alice as she crosses the looking glass. Look past the wrinkled face of the fussy old man fiddling with the microform who seems to wear the same clothes everyday: his eyes are forever changing, burning with the fire of a wounded soldier or soft with compassion for his fallen companion.

Come, fellow traveller. Let me release your hand, for you need a guide no longer. Explore the endless boundaries contained in this little brick hut.
"For yours is the world and everything that's in it, and what more you'll be man my son."